Real World

Heck. What's up with humongous houses? On vacation in the OBX, my whole extended family stayed in one house on the ocean, and now I'm living in a sprawling New England shack with about 17 others (I actually am not sure how many people really live here). It's fine. I mean, there's like six or seven bathrooms, seven or eight bedrooms, and two refrigerators... but not enough freezer space, so, that means eating fresh food as much as possible.

OK. Now colds. I always seem to get a cold at the most inopportune times. Like this week, when I've been at the theatre all week, 12 hours a day, sitting there doing nothing because I'm not really in the show, and ... oh heck, I just wish I were feeling better. Anyway, writing here seems to get more difficult as there's nothing really going on. So, if you want more posts, you'll have to suggest topics.

BEAR

Up here in NH for work work - like a real human - and on the way back to the house today, saw a BLACK BEAR! Holler.

TONY Turns Sixty

Ten minutes to go, I'm excited and ready. You can guess who I'm rooting for... the cast album of that gem came out this week, almost three weeks ahead of schedule in time for this weekend. I'm hoping my parents picked it up for me on their way to the airport to pick up my brother's girlfriend tonight on our vacation. We'll see. If they did, it won't matter who wins because I'll have my very own award to listen to and revel in all night! Holla! (back later with the results/commentary)

844: So far, I'd have to say that SWEENEY's musical performance was the best part of the show. Although I wasn't impressed with the show itself, they did a bang up job for this telecast. I mean, come on. Why would DROWSY want to only show Ms Foster? Didn't they want to do "Toledo Surprise" or "I Do I Do in the Sky" to showcase more people? Alas. At least the show won both Book and Music & Lyrics. It would have been a terrible thing otherwise.

848: Liza's a class act. Ugh, remember ABSURD PERSON SINGULAR? Ugh.

851: Oooo. John Doyle awarded by a superb Hank Azaria and Oliver Platt for SWEENEY. Happy anniversary to him and his partner Robert -- great anniversary gift, eh? That's why I love the TONYs, because people can thank their partners without any g-d hoopla. BUT, did they voters see the show? Come on. I couldn't understand the story because the emphasis for the audience was just based on "O, Patti's playing the tuba. How hysterical!"

854: Pesci and three of the four seasons - oh brother. More jukebox musicals. Sorry John Lloyd Young, I just can't stand 'em.

857: But gosh, he sure can sing. And the scenic design is pretty, too. Thank you TONYs for concentrating on these musical numbers instead of having another disaster like WICKED was.

906: O! Audra is brilliant. And heck, Ben Vereen and Julie Andrews - can it get any better?

908: Yes. Dick Van Dyke, Mandy Patinkin (and what are those glasses for...?), Jennifer Holliday. Heck yes.

911: AWAKE AND SING! Grand. Actually, I just realized about four weeks ago that Andre Bishop is white. Ha, I don't know why I thought otherwise. O, I'm so pleased - I almost didn't go see it, except for this guy who sat next to me the first time I saw DROWSY and he said it was really wonderful. Bernie is a little bit wordy, huh?

916: I think someone needs to rethink the rules for the nominating committee. THE WEDDING SINGER? Oh no. The lyrics are atrocious, the music, everything -- please close. Please close soon. Let's finally let them nominate anyone they want or only two or three or whatever instead of forcing ridiculous nominees like this one. I mean, good for the cast for having work, but, hey, you can go out on a TheatreWorks tour or something. Or whatever. YUCK.

925: Thank you! cast of SPAMALOT for making this annual boring speech about what the Wing does really funnny! Holla!

929: Sara Ramierz and TR Knight --> I LOVE them on GREY'S ANATOMY. Carolee maybe doesn't deserve it for this role, but gosh she's greand. Beth Leavel is THE WINNER! "YES!" says Sara Ramiez!!! YAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYA! "Oh my gooness gracious sakes alive. breathe. breathe. Thank you life for the priviledge ... this role of a lifetime ... I AM FLYING. Cheers, dahling, I love my job, thank you!" [here she is on stage with Danny Burstein. brilliant.] Beedow is SO pleased -- this is the only award he truly cared about. Leavel is just absolutely superb in this role, in this show, everything about it.

933: O, Cyndi is still as bad as she was when I saw it. Sorry, girlfriend, stick to what you know.

943: The audience goes WILD over the Bush knock, "a republican puppet... that rings a bell."

945: WHOA. A total upset, Christian Hoff wins Featured Actor in a Musical. Holy cow. NO ONE expected that. It was Jim Dale 100%. "This is a perfect story," he says as he says hello to his new baby in his wife's womb. "Hi baby." Wow, that was a big surprise.

950: Brian Stokes Mitchell narrates a very weird living montage. What the hell were they thinking? Hal Prince, though, couldn't be there in person thanks to his Vegas PHANTOM. "I'm a lucky guy." And now we have to hear "Music of the Night" and haha! This abriged version confuses Howard McGillin as the orchestra went where he didn't. That was awkward. REALLY awkward.

1000: The inevitable Julia Roberts entrance. "You people are insanely talented people." Well, at least she looked great.

1004: And, of course, it goes to Richard Griffiths in his Broadway debut as THE HISTORY BOYS puts another notch on the wall. "In all those years I have never been able to, with a sweep of my arm, address six thousand human beings. It's quite gratifying." Thanks his wife who persuaded him not to quit, "what a clever idea that was."

1011: Kelli O'Hara managed to make quite the switch between PIAZZA and PAJAMA GAME. Wish I had been able to get tickets to that, but it was sold out.

1017: Rita Wilson is making her Broadway debut tomorrow night in CHICAGO? Hrmph. Musical Revival goes to PAJAMA GAME. Interesting - but probably the choice I would have made, too, considering I've seen the other two and didn't want it to go there.

1020: August Wilson/Wendy Wasserstein memorial --> damn! James Earl Jones shows actors how to do a monologue, for sure. Cynthia Nixon, though, should have picked her other, instead of talking to the whole six thousand people. And the memoriam section was so tasteful, as we didn't have the scattered applause that makes the Oscars so atrocious.

1026 (commercial break): I'm not opposed to this non-host evening. In fact, I think it makes a lot of sense. There's no worrying about trying to have enough time for the host to say something funny, come back and entertain the audience, etc. I'll be interested to see what Millie (NYC Entertainment Addict) has to say from her seat inside the awards, but from the comfort of my vacation house bed, I think it's great. It keeps the telecast moving very smoothly.

1030: "If the play isn't worth dying for, maybe it isn't worth writing," Terrence McNally quoted by David Hyde Pierce. Not surprisingly, HISTORY BOYS wins Best Play, underscored (again) by "Bewitched, Bothered and Bewildered." Alan Bennett himself will accept it. Hmm... usually the producer's job, no? Plus, his bowtie's knocked a bit... at least it's not a clip on! That's the English for you.

1033: Oprah arrives to "celebate (sic) Broadway" and THE COLOR PURPLE... which, offered a really solid musical number. I didn't see the show, but it looks like it might be another cult classic like CAROLINE, OR CHANGE and DESSA ROSE (in style and theme). And this is how you showcase a musical -- LaChanze has her opportunity to "show off" within the confines of a company number. I like that. And she's so beautiful.

1045: Thank you Glenn Close for pronounced Michael Cerveris' name correctly, emphasis on the first syllable. A crazy category - but Young pulled it off as expected. Ben Brantley sit down, I know you're thrilled. These Jersey Boys are a bit self-indulgent, I'm sorry. I don't want to sound terrible, but oh well.

1047: I LOVE BERNADETTE, so much! Goodness, another huge name category, and Chita looks surprised at what show she's in. LaChanze wins it, and Sutton Foster mouths "oh good!" She was very sweet and happy, and I'm very glad she got it... now I just wish I had seen her show.

1055: Broadway legend Julie Andrews in a perfect red dress. What a voice. What a woman. I can't even imagine that voice announcing one's name -- what it must feel like. And the winner is... JERSEY BOYS. Well, like the critics said, the road houses know they'll make a huge buck on it if it wins, so. Sorry, DROWSY. But you won book and score, so, really, you are the best new musical. JERSEY BOYS is the best old musical.

1059: Julie signs off from this "magical night" and asks people to support live theatre. "Here's to the next sixty years." Nothing like ending on time.

Monday Tube

Late Show: Lindsay Lohan was horrible. TERRIBLE. HORRID. RUN AWAY. In her appearance on Dave last night, she not only embarrassed herself, but me too -- here in my living room. She's a bumbling, rambling, nervous, unintelligent, childish, naive, lanky, ugly fool. Dave had a great time with her... making her squirm and trying to focus her -- she actually got up to leave at one point. Christ. She does better in magazines folks, no not because of her looks, but because SHE DOESN'T HAVE TO TALK IN A MAGAZINE. I wouldn't pay a million dollars to be an editor for one of her magazine interviews. Dumbass. I'll see her new movie, but I'll close my eyes when she's on the screen.

Lovespring, International (Mondays @ 11pm EST) on Lifetime, television for women and Beedows, was alright. It wasn't spectacular, but it wasn't bad. I had a good time watching it, laughing out loud at a couple points -- Jennifer Elise Cox as the secretary--excuse me, executive assistant--had some grand moments when she caught her coworker (Sam Pancake) in an embrace on his desk with his brother-in-law... and then went to squeal on him to their boss, played by the superb Jane Lynch.

The Times is right on the mark when it explains this show in the same vein as Christopher Guest and Larry David -- but the problem is that mainstream America has not caught on. That's why Mitch Hurwitz's brilliantly irreverent Arrested Development was cancelled. It doesn't look like LI is going to turn into something as groundbreaking--that's right, groundbreaking--as AD, but who knows. At least it's a step in the right direction.

Rats paraded a rap star

No matter how many times you put the word POP next to itself in succession, it will always remain a palindrome.

"We've been excited about it for months," explained a forty-five year old woman from Wichita in the Daily News. Her family had gotten tickets to see the critically panned Three Days of Rain. Sure, it was Broadway's hottest ticket. Sure, playwright Richard Greenberg and actors Paul Rudd and Bradley Cooper, not to mention director Joe Mantello had a good thing going ... oh! that's right. It was the Julia show and no one could forget about it.

What sort of a society is this? People spend months waiting to see a movie star? Come on, America. That's wacko. I know, I know, people think movie stars are the greatest thing -- and, I'm sure if I were one, I would too -- but they're just human. It's the brilliant Mr Shatner that explains it in his album, Has Been, that "just because you've seen me on your TV / Doesn't mean I'm any more enlightened than you ... Sorry to disappoint you / But I'm real." No need to go gaga over seeing one of them, or worse, waiting months to see one. For goodness sake, no one's going to wait in line to see you, honey.

Today: birthday greetings to Anybodys.
Tomorrow: watch out for the devil monster beast.
Soon: How does Antoinette Perry feel about Canadians? (in my ongoing personal quest for The Drowsy Chaperone's legacy)

Ring Ring, Who's the Ding-a-ling?

A fun Broadway news day... including this ditty, ganked from Page Six:

June 2, 2006 -- Richard Griffiths finally had enough when the first act of the Wednesday matinee of "The History Boys" was interrupted for a fourth time by a ringing cellphone. "I cannot tolerate this anymore. I cannot compete with electronic devices," he told the audience. "You were asked nicely to turn off your phones. You were told it was against the law. I'm going to walk off and start the scene again. If this happens again, I will end the show." A witness said all four phones were in the same row and apparently in the same family. "At intermission, a manager ran down the aisle to throw them out," we're told. No rings were heard in the second act.

It's really repulsive. It's a terrible thought that actors have to contend with every day at every performance, and whether Griffiths was correct in his approach or not is not the issue (here and now anyway). Now, don't get me wrong, I have a mobile phone and have used it daily since December 2003. It's a brilliant invention, but the stupidity of the human race has turned it into a brilliant annoyance. How can someone presume it's OK to let a phone ring during a LIVE SHOW? Christ.

Man in Chair is right (terribly paraphrased with love): and then they have the nerve to answer during the show. "Oh hi! What are you doing? I'm ruining the moment." "Oh I couldn't get out tonight so I thought I'd ruin the moment by proxy." At least back then [1920s] they didn't have cell phones to ruin the moment. Although I'm sure they had something ... bugles, maybe.

ALSO MAKING HEADLINES today is the West End mounting of SUNDAY IN THE PARK WITH GEORGE which is doing terrificly well and has extended through September 2.

Playbill.com goes backstage with Sutton Foster at the Marquis Theatre last Wednesday [the video is a big file, just let it load in the background while you're reading back issues of this blog ... but for all the love of turkey, stick around to see the interviews with the rest of the cast backstage before the matinee, they're brilliant and similar to a little video mi amigos y yo made back in the day]. Thank goodness we finally learn why she's been wearing those bandages on her knee [the splits]. "Some people can see it, but I don't really care because I don't have bruises and that's better in the long run," she explains. And you know what, I'm glad they did this video interview because I have now come to respect Ms Foster SO incredibly much more. I didn't care for her in Drowsy at all, but seeing the difference between her character and her real self is a relief. What I didn't like was the character... all ego and glamour, but that's exactly what she was supposed to be. HOW STUPID AM I? I should know better. I should know better, and I didn't, and I apologize to Ms Foster. Apologies all around.